Monday, October 24, 2016

The Average American

The average American is overweight and just 10lbs or so from being obese.

The average American household income is $51K. The average American worker makes $30K annually.

The average American household is 2.6 people.

The American GDP per capita (person) is listed as 53K. The average household has 51K to spread between 2.6 people. Hmmmmm.

The average American lives paycheck to paycheck, in fact 3/4 do.

The average American does not have $500 saved to cover an emergency, in fact 2/3 don't.

The average American has $5,000 saved for retirement.

The average American reads 19 minutes per day.

The average American watches 5 hours of TV a day and 11 hours per day with all media.

The average American has a smartphone (68% do).

The average American eats 2500+ calories a day... or is it 3,700 calories per day?

The average American sleeps 6.8 hours per night.

The Average American performs 17 minutes of fitness activities per day.

The average American has sex 127 times per year, but that is misleading because...

The average American adult is not married.

The average American single has sex 49 times per year, average domestic couple has sex 146 times per year, and the average married couple has sex 98 times per year. (see

The average American reports being satisfied with their sex life (48%).

The average American knows someone addicted to painkillers.

Combining percentages of use, the average American has either been prescribed an antidepressant or a painkiller this year.

The average American can't name one Supreme Court Justice, in fact 2/3 can't.

The average American can't name the three branches of the government, in fact 2/3 can't. 1/3 can't name ONE BRANCH.

The average American child doesn't live in a traditional family (two married parents in first marriage).

In summary, the average American is overweight, bordering on obese. They make $15 per hour and have nothing saved for an emergency and barely anything for retirement. This might be due to spending money on the 3700 calories that they eat per day. They do have a smartphone. Thank God! Because how else will they consume 11 hours of media a day. They consume so much media and food that they barely have half an hour for reading and exercising and even sleep less because of it. Despite all of this media consumption, they can't name one of the 9 priests that rule the nation nor the form of their government. Remembering how their government is formed and ruled might be hard for them to focus on with the tremendous pain and depression in their lives that causes them to seek pharmacological remedies. Sadly, the average American faces this struggle alone.


Porter said...

There's a lot of space between middle and ends.

peterike said...

What a disaster this nation has become. There is indeed a lot of ruin in a nation, but at some point you reach the end.

Fred Goldstein said...

Actually the country has improved under Obama

Only white men are pessimistic. People of Color are optimistic

That tells you something right there

Knights of the West said...

"Sadly, the average American faces this struggle alone." To me this is the worst fact of all. We have taken the idea of "independence" to extremely destructive heights. All virtues taken to their extremes become vices. The amount of Americans who are truly alone is staggering. If you feel alone, check our

August said...

I am alone.
A little better off in some respects.
But sometimes I wish I could plug back in the T.V. and pretend the matrix is real.

Anonymous said...

hey there are only 8 priests. I red on my smartphone youtube that sodamizer killed the missing one with a baseball bat.

Laguna Beach Fogey said...

"Sadly, the average American faces this struggle alone."

This, IMO, is the defining characteristic of American life. There's a loneliness, an atomization, about this place that is extremely unhealthy and unnatural. If you're from abroad, or have lived for any length of time overseas, you'll know what I mean.

Random Dude on the Internet said...

Having been to Europe in recent years, it's interesting to see how couples, regardless of age, hold hands and talk to each other, even in degenerate cities like Berlin. In the US, everyone is staring at their smartphone. Some of them appear to have hostile body language as if they loathe having their ball and chain always with them. Kind of sad. Everyone really is out for themselves in the US and it's by design unfortunately.

Finding someone who is really with you is rare; anyone can find a girlfriend or wife but finding someone who actually cares about you is a real rarity in modern American society.

Tiny Duck said...

I'm beginning to think most of you guys have never been in a relationship

Interesting that People of Color are not as alone as white people

Larry Yardbird said...

My grandfather a former minor leaguer and tanker truck driver, retired comfortably at age 56 and had over three hundred people attend his funeral.

High Arka said...

"Priests." Calling Them "priests" is like calling It the "Cathedral."

Son of Brock Landers said...

Commenters on the alone part, yes this atomization is real, and some of it self induced. I've been telling my younger cousins to STFU about not having a great circle of friends when they are on their phone nonstop. Life is what you make of it. It's a series of choices and people love to take the easy path.

Troll Duck, I'll let you know the day I visit my grampa at the old folks home and see a black with a visitor. Never happens.

Yardbird, Similar thing happened with my grandfather and it was due to his commitment to his community. He was a fireman and then a volunteer fireman and also built the babe ruth league in my town. he touched a lot of lives. Died poor but with a wealth of friends. I don't think many of his 11 kids will experience the same when they go.

High arka, Priests applies, but 3 of them are rabbis.

Toddy Cat said...

"Interesting that People of Color are not as alone as white people"

Mugging, shooting, statutory rape, dealing crack, and incest don't count...

Portlander said...

Prison doesn't count.

Anonymous said...

"The average American worker makes $30K annually." and "They make $15 per hour" are not the same thing. First, the $30K annually is based on everyone who earned an income (including teenagers and part-time workers), so you can't just divide by 2000 hours and get an hourly rate. The average hourly rate for Americans is closer to $25.

Also, I don't know why you changed from "The average American eats 2500+ calories a day... or is it 3,700 calories per day?" to assuming the 3700 figure was right in the summary. I'm sure it's closer to 2500 calories, and I've found several studies (e.g. from the University of Michigan) that says it's close to 2500 calories for adult American males.