Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Movie Idea: A Bi-Curious Remake of "Vertigo"

I'm not dancing around it. Hollywood is a shit factory that destroys what it touches and filters everything through a terrible Hollywood view. They churn out a lot of crap and are remaking everything. I want one more remake, in the spirit of a new twist on the original concept. I want to see Hitchcock's "Vertigo" remade but with the Jimmy Stewart character cast as a woman for a bi-curious/lesbian version. Phew, the lightning bolt didn't just kill me. I love Hitchcock's movies, and watch them on a regular rotation. Hollywood remakes everything or turns toy lines into big budget action films. Let's spend a little money and remake Vertigo with an interesting twist.

The original Vertigo can be analyzed in novel format and length because of its beautiful story telling. I consider it one of the greatest uses of the film medium to tell the tale of love, lost love, fear, masculinity, modern life, etc. It is a wonderful expression of the human condition. You can have arguments that nothing after the 'therapy' clinic scene is real. It pushes buttons and makes you think. A remake that veers in a different way would be a fantastic homage to that film, unlike the terrible "Psycho" remake with Anne Heche and Vince Vaughn.

Ok, so here's my pitch: San Francisco - 2011 - Joan "Scottie" Ferguson is a 'retired' cop who quit the force due to a height related event. She's kind of femme but does dress in an androgynous manner. She hangs out with bohemian, artisty, hipster type bi girl nicknamed "Midge". There's the reference that they hooked up after "Scottie"s army days. An old Army male buddy who has done well financially contacts Scottie for a surveillance job. We follow the exact plot of the original "Vertigo" set in San Fran with some small time updates. The spirit that enchants Madeleine is a '60s woman who lost her child because of the evil patriarchy and went mad on hippie drugs and died. Pop Argosy who knows the 'old time' San Fran history would now be a total flamer. Scottie just kisses Madeleine, and we know they love one another but Scottie kind of fights it as it's a journey of self discovery and the confusion of her sexuality. We then follow the plot to the point of revelation where we learn that Madeleine/Judy was a bit of a attention seeking bi girl who manipulated Scottie as the Army buddy had a 'vibe' on her bi-curious ways. The ending is the same. No changes for modern America.

Joan "Scottie" Ferguson - This is my dream, so Angelina Jolie. Dress her in slacks and a tight vest over a dress shirt and other slightly butch looks. This will also pull in male viewers.
Midge - Hmmm, hipster bohemian type who gets rejected by Scottie and wears dorky glasses. Zooey Deschanel. Done.
Madeleine/Judy - Amber Heard. She's got the young, petite sexually adventurous manipulator and really launches a career in drama.
Gavin Elster (Army buddy) - Would McConnaughy take a role this small? Maybe.

This would be kind of like a Brokeback Mountain for the lesbian crowd.

1 comment:

neovictorian23 said...

Sheer. Genius. I guess Jolie doesn't have breasts anymore but it's Hollywood, no matter...