You done laughing?
Sarcasm On/ Oh my God, totally revving my engines seeing this 38 year old with a rocking body that is airbrushed to the point where she looks like an Impressionist painting. Super Latina es muy caliente and she is wicked smart getting a masters' degree. She even says she wrote a thesis! Oh man, I'd take her home to mom! She even taught me a Spanish phrase "Que rico". I'm gonna use that next time I see me a Latina. Eva Longoria even produced a show that was about devious Hispanic maids. She is soooooo hot. Maxim's so f-ing awesome!/Sarcasm Off
|Remember this surprised face for later|
No, we have to fire up the airbrush cannons and get divorced Longoria on the cover of Maxim. Longoia is another one of the rare birds of Hollywood who married a much younger man, and then got cheated on for a younger woman, humiliated in public (the woman wasn't as "hot" as Longoria but better than Tiger's girls) and had to end it all. Let us boost her ego while simultaneously telling young men that damn, she is 38 but the woman of the year. Ogle her. Value her for all of these flimsy outside things, and ogle her as your desired mate. The masters' degree is flimsy nothingness as it is in Chicano Studies with a special female twist. Her thesis was titled "Success STEMs from Diversity: the Value of Latinas in STEM Careers". The publicist who answered the Maxim's interview questions is probably different from the agent's lackey that wrote the thesis for her. This is the mental equivalent of masturbating in a mirror with a picture of her 21 year old self in one hand.
The progressive priests will be happy to see a "woman of color" as Maxim's woman of the year, but let's slow down and recall her Hall of Fame Surprise Face (after the bad advertisement it is the gaped mouth surprise) at finding out she was 70% European. Race is not biological or real except when Henry Louis Gates does genetic testing on celebrities. She or her publicist could stress her pride in being a Mexican from Mexico (her phrase from the DNA video) in this Maxim interview with a lesson to readers to say "Que Rico" for something good or special, but news flash Eva, those prole white guys reading Maxim who slept with a Hispanic girl have already heard "Que Rico". We understand. Stop trying so hard. Maxim, knock it off and get back to selling sheep on gadgets they don't need, lists of inane things and beta-proggy snark humor that subtly mocks your readers.