Saturday, February 23, 2013

Future SWPL Career Reassignments

In a wonderful future where we've slimmed down the leviathan state, destroyed NGOs and skewered non-profits, many SWPLs will be out of work. This will be a problem. It is one thing to have Joe Six Pack or Britney McMastercard lose their job, but it is entirely different for our credentialed vanguard to be out of work. An unemployed or replaced by a robot middle and lower class American can be bought off with trinkets, gadgets and Internet porn, but a SWPL will need self actualization. We might not be able to fire civil service employees, so we might have to think creatively how to reassign them. It goes completely against their stereotype, but SWPLs will make tremendous law enforcement officials.

SWPLs are smarter than the average American (not saying much) so we do not want to waste their intelligence in an world getting dumber by the birth. I know they swallow blank slatism and other lefty fallacies whole that are idiotic, but that is for status whoring. Many SWPL jobs are really the SWPL doing something that a family or social circle would do for a child or troubled individual but no longer happens because people are selfish jackasses or degenerates who accidentally had a child because they couldn't wear or require a man to wear a condom (mentoring, teen leadership development, parenting). We would need to match up SWPL skills. In our reformed future, we would need to provide the utmost security for our citizens as well as work as efficiently as possible to streamline the state's organs so that we can lower the tax burden as much as possible. What are some behavioral or occupational traits of SWPLs?

1. They know how to take orders from spending decades in school.
2. They are good at doing research.
3. They like to help people. They practically get off on bragging about it.
4. They are good at adapting to and using modern technology.
5. They like to travel.
6. They crave job security and will work for the state without feel self loathing or at least masking it by drinking and doing drugs.
7. They love to enforce rules (unwritten) in their group as well as in society at large.
8. They are great at feeling something for someone else like taking offense for entire races or religions not represented at a party.
9. They love to be the efficient one.
10. They love to be individuals in socially acceptable, conformist ways.

In a reformed future or restoration, there will be a massive need in processing the many criminals that will be finally dealt with as true barbarians should be. That will involve a lot of paperwork, multitasking and quick decisions. With their technology skills, they can set up the programs so that the judicial system runs quicker or so that welfare departments know if the welfare recipient passed their drug test and/or had their Norplant or Depo shot at the appropriate time (efficiency, technology). Every missing person case should get a personal SWPL case worker (empathy, travel, help). Every cold case will have at least one if not two SWPLs working on it (research, travel, help). If a SWPL solves a cold case, the SWPL gets a three month sabbatical to write a book about it and an interview on the top rated, privately funded podcast that replaces NPR. Health advocates, anti-smoking officials, diet advisers, policy consultants, and the rest of the SWPL infested occupations that will be defunded will unleash many educated individuals onto society. If we cannot technically lay them off and eliminate them from the government payrolls, we can reassign them for better use and application of their mental abilities.

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