Sunday, May 15, 2011

Zombies & Conversation Narcissists

The previous 6 month period has been one of reflection. Part of it was anticipating the birth of our first child. Part of it was disgust with a lot of people I interacted with, society in general, and the further devolution of the nation/world. Another motivator was discussing a lot of life's big questions or ideas with enlightened & younger family members, and how would my wife and I craft an environment that would be best for our future son. A major theme has been how people define themselves; their prime motivators for living. What to do in and with one's life?

One thing I focus on is the idea that even if I disapprove or am not happy with the adult decisions my child will eventually begint o make at age 18, I'll support him as long as he is healthy and happy. Whether Buddhist monk or chemical engineer, I will give 100% support. How he chooses to define himself, through work, travel, lifestyle choices is up to him. As long as he is healthy and happy, that is what I can wish for. This has been a constant refrain between my wife and I. What baffles us, is how so many people make decisions that do not lead to good health or happiness. The idea of soul development might as well be alien to them. Why is this? Why do people choose to become morbidly obese? Why do people choose lazy outs with bad results, that they know are coming, rather than reach for something more? Why do people become TV zombies?

People do want more. People will usually select 'more please' for good things or will desire optimal health/looks. They don't do the work though to get those things. Many people seem to desire more, but also seem to look around and go "screw working for anything" and settle into a routine of face stuffing, mind numbing and vegging out. It takes work to think, act, expand one's circles and knowledge, and that might be it. People just take the path of least resistance. Some social pundits have stated that the supreme goal in our mdoern society is to maximize status. This runs counter to what I see. How are people who cocoon themselves and zone out choosing to maximize status within their social or familial circle? I would support the notion that people try to maximize their status when in conversations or social settings as conversation narcissists, but when out of that environment turn back into zombies. It is fake. It is a fraud. It is easy to see through, but annoying to witness.

We have a conversation narcissist at work who is 250+ lbs and hates her life. She never speaks positive of anything in her home life, she turns every other person's anecdote into a way to relate or turn it back to her, and she has to stay at work 10 hours a day because she 'times out' of work too often from her socializing. She joins weight watchers every year to lose like 25 lbs, then gain 40 back. She walks weird and will probably die before age 70. I wonder what she would say if asked what her prime motivator in life is. These are the thoughts that run through my head when conversation narcissists and zombies cross my path.

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