Saturday, December 05, 2009

Advice for Tiger Woods

1. Don't cheat. You're photographed daily; it will be hard to hide
2. Learn to lock your cell phone
3. Target people who have something to lose or low self esteem (the Kirby Puckett method)
4. Don't leave voicemails
5. Don't send dirty texts
6. Use codewords and nicknames
7. When caught, get between your wife and weaponry
8. You have a prenup, don't renegotiate it
9. Don't do freaky sex on the side. Do that with your wife
10. Stay away from girls with collagen lips

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