Monday, June 30, 2008

That Whole Body Image Thing

I've typed about this before, but I really love to show my love of women with meat on them and my "lost cause" wish for women to collectively stop obsessing over their scale number or relative size. I know that there is the creeping Adonis problem with men, but I'll start paying attention when men die from eating disorders and severely destroy their reproductive & nervous systems by binging and starving themselves and high schools bring in speakers to discuss the ills of eating disorders. I view the male side as a work to get laid more often. Back on point, my wife and I discussed this weekend the problems of eatings disorders and how difficult it is to cure. Even if 'cured' it is a diffuclt road to stay in the healthy eating realm, and can be a day by day battle like alcoholism or drug addiction.

A recap of our discussions with the random comments that I remember the most are as follows....

"it comes down to a petty contest between women"... "i hate those women who are thin but complain about needing to lose weight in front of their friends, there should be a rule that you cannot complain about your weight unless you are the bigger friend"... "don't women see those Orcas with 5 inches of roots that somehow find a rail thin white or black guy??? why does anyone need to lose weight when they can still get laid"... "I wish that 70s look came back in style, you know real boobs and sporty legs?"... "bulimia is gross, just go without food, that's way easier"... "when a man sees a woman naked, he thinks 'thank you god, I this might be the last one i see naked'"...

It was a pretty sad conversation. We couldn't name a female friend who had NOT had an eating disorder. My wife's circle of friends is probably skewed as they are all dancers. What is even sadder is to see some of our friends eating healthy now, and what was the eating disorder worth: 10 fewer lbs for a few months? Some of my friends look roughly the same now years later. Some have an incredibly torurous attitude towards food still where they are calorie hawks and work out a lot. Is it healthy eating? Uhhhh, mostly. Are they getting proper nutrition now? Yeah, that is what counts.

In my circle of friends, I was lucky enough to know half a dozen great young women. They were a microcosm of my high school's horrible eating disorder problem. Fuck drinking or drugs or teenage pregnancy (that was bad too). What was sad was seeing them take turns. I didn't have any bulimic friends, but anorexia spread like the flu. I had friends who ate only Hot Tamales candy and drank Diet Coke. I had a friend who broke a stairmaster from overuse. What was amazing to witness was how girls could see it in others, but not when their time came. There was a tragic fate vibe in that circle. Each had their own reason: being the chubby one in the group, being the less attractive sister, having the psycho parents, having the mom in great shape, having no self esteem, being overly paranoid and insecure, having no control over their life so they controlled their food. What was sadder was seeing the efforts of friends who cared deeply about a friend try their best to help each other. It would fail because the fix, the change, the cure would only come from the person themself. As time passed and years were put between that era and our current lives, I saw the same patterns of behavior with different things and different problems arise. The eating disorders were a symptom of something else.

1 comment:

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